Learning My Way Around

I find it funny how things turn out some times. I once hated English. Now, not only do I have an English degree, I'm an English teacher. Yup, I got a job today! What is also ironic is that I'm going to be teaching kids, little kids at that. Why is that ironic? Because I intentionally majored in English so that I wouldn't have to work with kids! That was not the only reason why I switched, but it was "a" reason. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE kids! I really do. I just didn't think I had the natural talent to actually work with them. I don't really know how to communicate with kids, at least not like some people I know. I'm not sure if the job is going to be long-term, but you never know. The school also has a cram school with older kids. So I might be able to work with those kids in the future.

I still don't know which "career" I want to pursue or what it is I want to do with my life exactly, but I'm beginning to think that it should not be a big concern of mine, at lest for now. Living here has changed my perspective a bit. I'm beginning to see that life does not necessarily have to be a certain way, and that alternative life styles aren't a matter of better or worse, but just different. Besides those people living the hustle and bustle of city life, most people in Taiwan live quite candidly. Actually, simple is a better word to describe the general life style here (although, there are certain things that they are much more open about). This kind of simplicity is quite different from the States. I'm not sure how to describe it. Even though the life style is simple, the culture is quite saturated, and complex. Taiwan is young in many ways, but it is packed with a rich history that clearly governs the way things are today.

As an American, there are many things happening here that I don't understand. And for the most part, people are understanding of my situation. However, I am constantly being reminded of the words that my uncle said to me upon the first day of my arrival. He said, "Now that you're living here, you have to learn about and act in the ways of our culture. You cannot use your American perspective and live here with your American ways."

It's been challenging living here, interesting at the same time. Racial discrimination, classism, gender identification, all of it takes on a different shape here. It's like I've been thrown into a social and cultural jungle, and all of the sudden, I'm suppose to know how to act and behave. People don't see me as an American here. At work, I'm suppose to be as "American" as possible so that the parents would not doubt the "authenticity" of my English skills. And when I'm outside of work, I'm suppose to be fully Taiwanese despite of the hesitant expressions on people's faces because I don't dress very Taiwanese.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this, but I just needed to dish out some thoughts that's been preoccupying my mind these days. I have more, but it's already taken me a long time to type this entry out. So I'm done for now. Peace out!